March 23, 2008

Ideals and relationships

is something I noticed. Every time a person likes another of the opposite sex, (read likes as loves), that liking is based on an ideal. They have an ideal in their head and they mix and match and find the person is the closest to that ideal. The ideal can be in terms of looks, intelligence, emotions, et al. When a particular member of the opposite sex, accepts the initial advances and then rejects the entire thing, also known as a break-up, one has two choices, retain that ideal and at some level continue liking that person or change that ideal and get over that person. Strange is it not, how many people say that they are not able to get over somebody, when they actually mean that they are not able to get over the ideal that person meant to them. If only ideals were that easy to change!


Lazy Lavender said...

My ideal is mine to have. I don't just pick it up out of a list of ideals available.

So what if the last person I found similar to my ideal does not like me? My ideal is still mine, and if I still find him close to my ideal, I'd continue to like him, and respect him for what he is.

If I HAD to get over someone, stop liking him, I'd rather find reasons to make him appear different from my ideal, than change my conception of the ideal.

And I don't think you are suggesting that either.

Vinni said...

yeah, what u say is really true. its hard to get over ur supposed ideal match. and when u do, its all cool.

Rajaraman said...

Relationship are made when you accept persons as such with his plus and minuses. If you start matchingg with a list of ideals you cnat have relations at all. There are ggod and bad in every body. That is human.Even gandhi had his negatives.
So dont look at persons with a magnifying glass for his/ her minuses. Try to acept himm as such then the friendship wiull be fun enjoyable and long lasting. If you cnanot move out once and for all.
Relationships are full of adjustments and compromises. withoput that Life will only be full of divorces.Not only in married life but even among friends, relative, parents and so on

pushkala said...

Life is such a beautiful one timer...
Its always good to know wat u would really want and wat would be a bonus..
this saves a real lot of trouble ,,, be it relationship or career