The mother on the road cries out in despair,
“oh help me please I have a child".
Begging for her sake?
Or that of the child unborn?
Begging for what she never had,
People unknown shed a tear,
Ones those crocs are proud of.
Give a dime,
To the poor dear, they say
And they walk off into the twilight.
Does the woman care for the child?
Albeit it being unborn?
Is it a source of joy for her soul?
One to cherish for life?
Or is it a means to her meal of the day?
As I hold you now
In my arms
One wish seems to run
Through my body
And racks my soul.
The breath that flows
Through you
I wish would stop.
Taking you from the living
To the realms of the dead.
No one should see you now
As I see you now.
No one should hold you now
As I hold you now.
No should ever love you
As I love you now.
Die my darling dearest
And immortalize my love
A love that encompasses
That shall love you to death.
I sat there by the rocks,
Not having a care in the world.
I was not sure of my next meal for I just had one,
Heck, I am not sure if I will live till then.
There is creature that I have come across,
Too big for me to see clearly, I catch a glimpse.
He is big and tall and heavy.
Not like the others I have seen
And believe me I have seen many.
He is looking sad or I think he looks sad.
How can I say what his emotions are?
If at all he has any.
I am waiting to catch the next wave
To catch the surf in my hair,
But I can not help but look at the creature,
The one that stands directly above me.
He seems afraid of the water,
But curious nevertheless.
He wades into the water when the waves recede,
But runs back again when they reach the shore.
He eyes me suddenly
And walks over to where I am sitting.
I am not sure if I should run or freeze.
Sure that I cant out run him I sit there,
Willing him to do the worst.
He looks at me and I wonder,
Is he thinking about me the way I am about him?
I turn my eyes toward the sea,
My wife is waiting for me somewhere there,
I have to get her for it is getting late.
I wait for the waves to come and take me home,
But I can’t seem to leave this creature alone.
I sit through the wave,
And he seems happy to see me there.
The smile on his face makes me warm,
I take the next wave
And head home.
Aditya Rajaraman
07.12.2004
A Tribute to Sri's one evening on the rocks
Do you see in to my depths?
Oh dear now that you know me?
Words gone unsaid,
Thoughts gone unheard.
Clipped the wings of the bird
E’en before it could take flight,
Never gave the truth a chance
Even if it was right.
Million times you have said
Things I thought insane.
Thousand times I had to agree,
Feelings of sanity I hid.
Now that I am free my dear
From the bonds that held me,
Free to roam the skies,
To speak what is in my mind.
Do I feel the happiness?
That is rightfully mine
For which a price I had to pay,
The cost being my sanity?
Shall never trade the thoughts I have
For the feeling that one desires
Feelings are transitory dear
My thoughts are not for sale.
Fly free, o mind of mine
Break the bonds that attach you.
Roam the world free of whine
Painting the sky blue.
Never care for words not yours
They hold no clue for you,
The world we live in is ours,
Ones who understand so few.
I have been made invalid
By a system I never understood.
Are my morals squalid?
By which, all these years I’ve stood?
Oh mind! My laments are a lot
Not to worry that I talk to myself
Just leave me to rot
And fly away beyond the restraining shelf.
- Adi & Harsha, 2003
Note: this was a poem that Harsha and me tried writing and more than the poem the memories that are attached with it are precious.
Sitting by the dunes along the beach,
Watching his son run by,
With the setting sun on his son's back
And the blowing wind in his son's face.
The memories of the distant past
Brings a smile to his face.
His wife is now standing beside him
A hand his hair and the other to her eyes
A look of concern on her face,
For the safety of her first born.
Should I thank god, he wonders
Or be happy that everything is alright.
The day now seems so far,
When he could not find a soul.
No one would share his thoughts,
Neither would they dry his tear.
Then she came by one sunny day,
Bringing the sun in her smile.
Smitten by the first look,
Life was given to him on a platter.
He found her to be a friend,
One that would give anything to see him smile.
One that would hear imp speak endlessly
On topics that she had no inking about.
She would take his hands when he was scared,
Comfort him with the words that he needed to hear.
Now the world seems bliss
A fire glowing in his heart,
One of love and one of ecstasy.
Life gives him reasons to be,
Reasons that he's kill for and those he'd die for.
Now his wife is expecting again,
Another being shall be born,
With him being half the cause.
Now he smiles at last,
Happy just to be alive in a world
That fails to believe in belief.
Looking through the past year books,
I came upon a familiar face,
One that I seen a thousand times
Spent countless hours with
Time took us apart,
Promises made
To keep in touch
By mail or by a phone call
All seem to have gone in vain.
I cant remember
The last conversation,
About the latest girl friend
Over the last cup of chai
Now I am not sure where he is
Or what he is doing in life.
The search begins now,
There are stories to be told.
Of times spent apart
And stories to be made
Of times to be spent together.
Dated: 16.02.06
Brothers gray black and white
Brothers of gray are opening out,
Replacing their brothers of black.
Old age seems to be catching up
Signs of having lived too long.
A time when the time left to live
Is shorter than the time lived,
When the memories of the times past
Seem better than the hopes of those to come.
When things near and far are a blr
A touch of a hand gives no feeling,
A meal can not be chewed anymore
All that is left is an empty smile.
Words of wisdom there are many,
From pits into those there was a fall.
Advice to those who are to follow
Of how to avoid the stumbling block
For hopes harbored there is no room
As there is no time to fulfill them,
The end is of the road is drawing near
The time shall come to soon disappear.
Dated: 27.12.2002
Taking this statement made popular by the F.R.I.E.N.D.S series, where every one has to do anything saying “O, my god”. So what is it about that unseen person/thing/being that enables one to overcome no matter what is the hurdle that he or she is facing? Faith in divinity, what is it? I mean, I am still to understand what divinity is, but to have faith in it seemed absurd to me.
The best instance of this shall be our parents. By our, I am including all those who are less than 30 years old. The reason that I am doing this because it is around this time that the faith in the abstract was replaced by faith in a more concrete being, the self.
To understand what someone means when he/she says “god will give” is difficult. My father is a staunchly religious person. Each day will start of with a prayer and each night will not end without him spending at least a few moments in front of a depiction that has four arms! Yet he is a successful person and borders on brilliant. This is completely opposite to me, a moderate achiever.
In fact I have had many discourses with a friend of mine as to what is the reason that god exists. The main reason that we were able to come up with is that during the times that the thought process of man was not developed, there were things in nature that scared him. Imagine, you are alone in the forest and you see thunder and lightening. What do you do? Think that it is just electrical discharge and leave it? Well you could do this if you knew what electricity was. Since you have no idea that electricity exists you do the next best thing. You make it all-powerful and then pray that it will not harm you. This can be extended to all the gods of all faiths. Take the thunderbolt throwing Indra of Hinduism or the same with Zeus of the ancient Greeks.
Coming back to faith, I guess that over the years, faith in divinity has been a security blanket, a way of saying that this is not the end. There is something more to come, A way of saying to your self that I may be down but then I am not beaten. However, since science, the all-powerful science has come up with all the right reasons to justify why god does not exist and the religious heads have all the wrong ones that say that god exists, god is being pushed to the back shelf of life.
Also during years past, god was a method to keep the society in check. How many times have we been told, “Don’t do anything bad, else god will punish you”. So much that we have stopped listening to it completely.
Then why is it that there are people that still believe in that all powerful, all pervasive being? That is a question of faith. That I cannot answer for you. All I can say is that it is another among the long list that differentiates us from the animals. May be if we did not have a god we shall not kill so many of our own species in his name. It is too late for all that now. The security blanket has become a way of life; a check has become a barrier; faith has become fanatic. O My God!
